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2005-09-05 - 3:29 p.m.
Well - she's here. And she sure is a cute one, but what the fuck� did I jinx myself?? I brought her home from the hospital� everything was lovely. She ate great, she slept wonderful. She was a content and happy baby. My patience was plentiful, my heart overflowed with love. I happily bragged to everyone and anyone who would listen about what a good baby she was. Suddenly she�s 2 weeks old and everything has blown the fuck up. She doesn�t sleep. She�s only happy when she�s attached to one of my boobs. And then she�s overfed and she�s spraying a jet of puke all over me, herself and the living room. I have not slept but 2 hours combined for the past 2 nights and my nipples feel like someone dragged me across a concrete parking lot by my feet with my shirt off. My patience supply is completely exhausted. The sound of her cry is emblazoned in my head � so even when she�s not crying, I still hear her loud and clear as if someone were holding her mouth up to my ear. I saw a picture of myself from the other night. I recognized my face, except now it looks like I have 2 big saddles of ham dangling from my once defined jaw line. Gross. Should you read about me jumping off the Brent Spence Bridge it was because I saw a (panoramic) picture of my ass. So we won�t even go there. Here's to better days! *clink*
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