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2004-09-05 - 2:21 p.m. "Eat Your Fingers Off" "That's odd," I thought to myself. Besides its overbearing assumption that I even HAVE a family, OR that it's been around for 30 years I then realized that not ONCE have I ever seen this particular - or ANY bar of soap getting up to tend to the baby at 3 in the morning. Where is this bar of soap when my husband is demanding clean work clothes? I have yet to hear this said bar of soap offer to help cook dinner. The only thing that this soap DOES is make bubbles and soap scum. Even then WE have to do all of the work of lathering, sudding and then scrubbing the tile and porcelain free of soap scum. It's not as if though we just stand there while it "takes care of us". Fortunately I have had the good sense not to rely on this bar of soap to keep an eye on the baby during my absence. Based on its past performance record, I don't think it would make a very good baby sitter. "But, officer... it said on the box... " And back to my first point - what about the unhappily single person who bought the soap? "Helping you take care of your family for over 30 years --- THAT YOU DON'T HAVE!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAH!!!!" (reflective and astonished pause)Sheesh!! I do wonder if the wording of this "helping you take care of your family for over 30 years" is one of those slogans that has been lost in translation. No, it's not quite so awful as Kentucky Fried Chicken's slogan of "finger-lickin' good." being translated into Chinese as "eat your fingers off." or Coca-Cola translating to "Bite the Wax Tadpole" - but you see my point. Were I to reccommend this particular brand of soap to a friend, I don't think I would mention how well it helps me take care of my family. Maybe that it smells nice ... something along those lines. It just doesn't make any sense.
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